It is not uncommon to see in movies, two people who have broken up yet end up sleeping together only at an impulse or out of a craving for physical contact with their ex. Life doesn’t work that way, as shown in the movies, does it? It is not so simple and easy to give in to your ‘impulse’ and react by somehow ending up in your ex’s bed. A lot of thinking needs to do, questions need to be answered and concerns need to be addressed before sleeping with your ex. So how do you know when to and under which circumstances is it the best and most feasible to sleep with your ex? The answer is: there is no concrete and correct way of telling the best time and situation to sleep with your ex. It solely depends on the time and the feeling that tells you if it’s right or not. Do not confuse feeling here with impulse. Impulse is when you fail to gain any control over yourself and your thoughts and give in to your not-so-correct/positive desires.
What the statistics say
According to a survey by Westword, almost 99.9% of people answered a yes when asked if they would want to sleep with their ex with ‘no strings attached and just like a one-night stand. This tells how serious people are about relationships these days. The decision to sleep with your ex should be made on: the correct and appropriate timing, your level of contact and understanding with your ex, and how far along both of you have come down the path to reunite.
In some cases, sleeping with their ex might be the final step that marks both of them getting back together in a relationship, while in some it might be the beginning of hating their ex even more altogether. Hence, one should be highly careful about the expected way their ex would see and treat both of them sleeping together after breaking up. It is also possible that your ex might be only using you for physical purposes, which might hurt you even more and go against your expectations of getting back together.
How can sleeping with your ex increase the chances of you getting back together? Well, break-up sex usually is more angry and intense, hence, it can be used as a weapon to impress your ex and eventually persuade them to get back with you.
Before you make a move…
Before sleeping with your ex you need to pay attention to certain signals and signs of whether the timing is right. Sleeping too soon with your ex after a breakup might put them off, giving the impression of you being too desperate and eager to get back together. Or having it too late might mean that because you could not find anybody else as yet, you decided to settle back with your ex.
Look out for some physical and emotional cues from your ex like body language or they listen carefully to their words. You don’t want to push your ex into sleeping with you as it might result in leaving your ex feeling guilty and disgusted at you for using them like that and drive them even further. By playing a little ‘hard to get you will be in charge of everything happening without even your ex finding out or getting guilty about it.
Friends with benefits
Avoid the ideology of ‘friends with benefits or ‘no strings attached if you want to reunite with your ex. Remember, this may put off your ex completely sooner or later. Sleeping with your ex with no feelings or emotional attachment may seem very appealing in the beginning but it is the road to your own doom. Your ex will quit sleeping with you once they’ll find someone better and more appealing than you, leaving you all alone.
Your ex might also get tired of you after sleeping with you a couple of times and lose interest. Also, sleeping with you might become just a routine physical activity for your ex with no deep involvement with you, as they might be mentally and emotionally elsewhere. Hence, deciding when to sleep with your ex is a tricky business and needs to be well thought out and thought overactivity.